Nicole be Thinking...

First of all... I'm tired of this dismal picture of the successful black woman who is lonely because either she intimidates black men or no black men are "qualified" to be with her (since successful black women outnumber successful black men 3-to-1...) The successful black women I know are married, single because they want to be, or are lesbians. None of them are lonely or sad. None of them think that dating white men is "the answer" to their "problem." I read this little article, "Interracial Love Is the Answer for Black Women," and I disagree with it. What worked for the woman in the article may not work for other black women. I don't care what Oprah says about seeing what's out there. I don't believe that "black women are in a market failure." Having said all that, I'm not totally opposed to dating a white man. Seeing interracial couples does nothing to me. Folks find love where they find it, and that's co...

I got into a little debate with my dad about President Barack Obama and "the black agenda." My dad thinks Obama should do more to help black America and that he should spend time addressing black leaders. (These are the same "leaders" who wanted to castrate him and said he wasn't "black enough...") Needless to say, I disagree... 1. Obama is a black man. He should be trying to help black people.      He is the President. He should be trying to help ALL people. For him to focus on black people because he is black would be detrimental to his political career and any progress we hope to make in the future. Plus, there is no Black agenda. What works for one black person may not work for another. What one family needs another may not. 2. If you're saying he shouldn't focus on specific groups, then he shouldn't do anything for women or gays.     If black legislators and lobbyist were pushing for laws to help their black constituents the way ...

~Adele Listen! Wait, do you see my heart on my sleeve? It's been there for days on end and It's been waiting for you to open up Just you baby, come on now I'm trying to tell you just how I'd like to hear the words roll out of your mouth finally Say that it's always been me That's made you feel a way you've never felt before And I'm all you need and that you never want more Then you'd say all of the right things without a clue But you'd save the best for last Like I'm the one for you You should know that you're just a temporary fix This is not rooted with you it don't mean that much to me You're just a filler in the space that happened to be free How dare you think you'd get away with trying to play me Why is it everytime I think I've tried my hardest It turns out it ain't enough cause you're still not mentioning love What am I supposed to do to make you want me properly? I'm taking these chances and getting awa...

Last week, my Modern Grammar professor proclaimed -- to prove a point about censorship -- that he doesn't believe words hold a lot of weight. And so… he uses the word "fuck" freely. However… my Modern Grammar professor is a white man at an HBCU… He qualified his statement about words having no weight by saying that there are some words he won't use because of their impact on others and possibly himself. He said he's sure there are also words we won't use. My guess is that his list includes derogatory words surrounding race and sexual orientation. But what's on my list? Any thing? Is there anything I'd never say? Not really. To some extent, I understand what he means. Words are just words. Saying "fuck" is the same as saying "supercalifragilisticexpialidocious;" it has only the meaning we give it. However, words definitely carry some weight. If my mother were to say with some force, "Pick up these clothes!" I would prob...

What is the point of non-science majors taking science classes? I'm not interested in chemistry. I'll never apply this "knowledge." My lack of interest translates to a lack of effort (I didn't even buy the textbook…) which will likely translate to a C on my transcript. But what exactly does that C say about me? That I'll never be a chemist? Ok; I won't. That I did enough work to pass? Fine; I'll take that. What will that mean for my career goals? Um… Nothing. The purpose of general education is to give the student a well-rounded education. In Tennessee State University's 2007-2009 Undergraduate Bulletin, it is stated that: So my failure in chemistry is evidence of a lack of competency in the natural sciences. Hmmm… The things is… I've never had to discuss covalent bonds, ionic compounds, ions, cations, anions, etc. In fact, after high school chemistry, I never saw any of this again until the chemistry class I'm taking right now. C...

So… My New Years dress never came. Last time I called, I thought I had resolved this issue and my dress was coming. But I called today because I noticed that I still haven't received it. Do you know WHY I haven't received the dress? The chick on the phone told me that her notes said that the last time I spoke to someone on the phone. I cancelled my order. I CANCELLED MY ORDER???? After a deeep breath, I said, "What do you mean?" The woman then tells me that she saw that I had cashed in the merchandise credit for the dress, but I cancelled the dress order. That makes no sense. "If that's the case, ma'am," I said, "Why didn't you send the credit to me? It doesn't make sense that I would cancel the order yet cash in the credit for the dress ." "Uh… Yes ma'am. That's true. Let me look…" She was really nice about it. Until she started talking some nonsense about them putting the credit on an imaginary Macys credit car...

My advisor wrote a veeery nice letter of recommendation that will surely aid in gaining me admission to a truly great summer program. In the letter, she mentioned that my biggest weakness is that I "turn off" in situations that aren't academically stimulating and I that I don't engage with classmates that I don't feel are on my level. Ok. So… I'm an intellectual snob. I'll be that. =] Alright, alright… Maybe I shouldn't "turn off" in boring classes. I tend to drop classes that are boring and if I have to stay, my attendance and participation suffer. I feel like I need to be working on something if I'm in school. I'm in school to get these credit hours and grades toward a degree, yes. But I would also like to be intellectually stimulated. (especially if I'm paying for it…). I love knowledge. I like learning. I don't like busy work. Classes like Chemistry and Statistics don't help me get any closer to achieving my career g...

I was lurking around Facebook the other day… This guy I went to high school with popped up in the "suggestions" area on the home page. I noticed that his name is hyphenated and it threw me for a loop. Further investigation led me to see that he's listed as "engaged" to a girl whose last name matches the name he added to his own. As the frown appeared on my face, the thought of a man taking MY name in marriage disgusted me. The Nicole inside my head couldn't call him a punk fast enough. But why? What's wrong with a man taking his intended wife's name in marriage? Plenty. Names are significant. What you call someone expresses endearment, ire, esteem, contempt etc… Because of this, I am not a fan of nicknames or the diminutive form of most names. (i.e. Nikki for Nicole. Billy for William. Etc…) I like the identity that my whooole name encompasses. When a woman gets married, she takes the last name of her husband. I'm not certain about where this c...